Divorce sucks!

Have you ever really stopped, sat down and taken a hard…long look at your life?  Well, two years ago I had not.  At that time in my life, I had thoughts that I should be doing bigger and better things.  But I never did anything other than what I considered “safe.”  I think I’m finally starting to realize that some risks just have to be taken.

When I was a little girl I dreamed of living some sort of amazing life, filled with love, and of course the fairy tale ending.  Like most young girls, I wanted the big wedding and to be swept off my feet by an amazing man who would give me my happily ever after.  But my story did not go as planned.  My dreams ended about two years ago in August 2012.

Life happens.  Isn’t that a quote we’ve all heard?  Well, life happened to me.  It stuck its cold fingers deep into my chest and ripped my heart out without even blinking an eye.  Luckily though, I think it was trying to teach me some sort of lesson.  So “life” left my heart in a jar, and put it on an end table next to my front door.  After a few years of clawing and crawling, I made it to that table and have found the piece of me that’s been missing.  I wish I had a better story to tell you, maybe something crazy about how I traveled the world and experienced all these amazing feats.  But mostly it’s about heart-break, building stronger relationships, and self-growth.

In 2012 I separated from husband, and a little less than a year later we were officially divorced.  Divorce, although I realize that it does happen, is not something I wish for anyone.  I’m the type of person that fully believes in “til death do us part.”  But my fairy tale did not pan out how I envisioned it.  I see now that it was for the best, it made me stop and think about everything in my life.  I know that because of that experience I am a better person than I was a couple of years ago.  I’m stronger, more loving, forgiving, honest, and not willing to settle!

I do have to say there is nothing that I regret about the years I spent married to my ex.  We just didn’t work together.  I don’t hate him; in fact I wish him all the best life can bring.  I can look back and say that we did share some really great times.  However, there were other times that were not so great.  Everyone has their own idea of how they felt they were treated in a relationship, and those ideas may not always be the same between the two parties.  Personally I never felt that I mattered, that nothing I did was ever good enough.  And not that it was just him making me feel that way.  I was very insecure; we all have our moments of feeling that way, right?  I mean, I was married, I had my Bachelor’s degree, but I had no job.  So to me it felt as if I wasn’t contributing to our “family.”  For some reason, I was being overlooked and every attempt I made failed.

In the last fight my ex and I had, I was told that maybe I wasn’t finding work was because the only job I’ve had was in a dental office.  But my thought was, “someone has to take a chance right?”  I am definitely not a stay at home, let the man work type of girl.  I wasn’t raised that way.  I grew up watching my mother and father work, trying their best to provide for their family, and equally doing their part to make things work.  I’ve always been taught that you rely on you; you don’t need someone else to “take care” of you, so to speak.

Back to my story, a month after we split up I got a call for an interview.  Finally!!!  That job, I got!  It was nothing fancy, and in a world completely foreign to me.  But I had a job, and I was going to do everything I could to keep it.  So off to the land of retail I went.  Not sure why I had never done retail, because after working there for a short time I realized that it fit me.  I love connecting with people, and helping people.  It made me happy to go to work and put a smile on someone’s face.

Fast forward to now, I’m still in retail and an assistant manager for another store.  I love it, and my customers love me!  Do I think I will be in retail for the rest of my life?  Who knows? But I do know that I get to make other women feel good about themselves, and give them confidence.  That is something that I struggled with for so long.  I still have my moments, but I am a better person now than I have ever been in my entire life.  Maybe it has to do with the people I have met over the past two years, or the relationships I’ve built and improved on, or maybe it is just me evolving.

However you look at it, I am grateful for everything that I’ve been through.  I have laughed, cried, became weirder, dated, loved, and smiled more than I could ever imagine in the past two years.  All of it has given me a deeper faith, taught me to love deeper and wholeheartedly, and to never…ever give up on myself!  I know I will fall in love again, and finally have my happy ending.  It’s not always going to be pretty and I may even get hurt again.  But I do know that once I find my soul mate (yes, I believe in that), it is going to be the most terrifyingly beautiful experience of my life.  Until then I’ll continue on my path.  I know now that I was placed on this earth to help people.  I don’t know in what context yet, but every day I am reminded that I can make a difference in someone’s life.  And most times it only takes the tiniest of effort, even if it’s just a smile!

Until next time…

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Taking A Break

Hi all!

Usually I’ve never announced my small absences, but this time I felt it was needed. I may around elsewhere on the web, but due to some personal issues I need to take a break. I love my readers and I’m so thankful for you all who stop in to read. I will be back soon, and hopefully back with more recipes and DIY projects.

Thanks in advance for understanding.
Until next time…

Oh, How Pinteresting Wednesday! Summer Loving

Hi All!

It’s Wednesday, and time for “Oh, How Pinteresting  Wednesday” with Michelle over at The Vintage Apple.  I know I have been an awful blogger!  I missed blogging last week altogether.  But Pinteresting Wednesday is one of my favs, and tomorrow I’ll have an album review for singer/songwriter Nick Gill’s new album Waves Are Only Water.  As for today I thought I’d go with a summer loving theme, just a few things that remind me of summer.  Although I’m not loving this heat so much right now.  I love the fashion summer brings, the beach, the cold drinks, and good times.  But living in Cali, especially the area I’m in, the heat is no joke.  110 today with a low of 80, really?  I know some of you are in those humid states, and I feel for y’all!  Well enough about the heat, let’s get to those pins.

 

Summer Loving

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*this pin wasn’t linked to the correct post, so I put the correct source as my “source”*

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So that’s all the pins for this week.  I hope you’re enjoying summer so far, and staying cool!  Don’t forget to stop by The Vintage Apple and check out what others are pinning.  If you have a blog and Pinterest, head over to The Vintage Apple and link up!  You can find all my boards and pins here.  And if you need a invite let me know in a comment, and leave your email.

Until next time…

Lake time and Magic Mike!

Hi All!

I’ve been MIA for a little while.  I’m a little bummed, I missed “Oh, How Pinteresting Wednesday” again!  The past week has been pretty fun, and just a bit crazy.  Last weekend my husband decided that he wanted to go to the lake.  I know some of you may not understand, because you’re thinking “The lake?  That’s awesome!”  And I’m right there with you, I love being outdoorsy so the lake was a great idea.  But my hubby is not the outdoor lover that I am.  So I jumped all over the fact that he wanted to go relax.  I went and bought an inflatable 2 person boat, I made sure we had drinks and food, and of course sunscreen.

  

For me the sunscreen worked great, but for my husband not so much.  The next day the front half of him looked a bit like a tomato.  It’s taken almost a week, but he is just about back to normal.  Yay for me because I haven’t been able to really hug him since Sunday!  But now we’re almost to a new weekend, and I plan on kicking it off right.  And that is where a girls night comes into play along with these men…

Yes…tonight my friends and I will spend a nice evening out, having dinner and watching Channing Tatum & cast as strippers in Magic Mike.  Believe me when I say I have never, and probably never will see a male stripper personally.  It really does not appeal to me.  But I will make an exception for this because…well…it’s Channing Tatum, Matthew McConaughey, Matt Bomer, and Joe Manganiello.  Love all of them separately, and together I’m sure it’s going to be great.  I’ve even sent my friend and cousin “Chan-A-Grams.”  Yeah, sounds awful right?  You should check it out, even if you don’t send them to anyone.  Just preview them and enjoy!  Seriously, I have not been this excited to go to the movies in a little while.  This is definitely one of those “guilty pleasure” type of movies, and I’m okay with that.

Is anyone planning a girls night, or going to see Magic Mike this weekend?  Hope you all have a great weekend!

*Magic Mike poster downloaded from Magic Mike website here.

Until next time…